#ThankfulThursday
Years ago, I was in the midst of a personal relationship that had become more misery than happiness. It was draining my self-esteem and depression had started to steep into my core. I was finding it easy to just let things be and bury myself in the depths of despair as fighting was too hard and I didn’t seem to have the strength to pull myself out.
One day a small incident led to some words and before I knew it, the dam had burst. Rather a blindfold was lifted off my sight and I could see myself from the eyes of a third person; almost like an out-of-body experience. The thought that flashed in the head of “that” person was – “Whoa! why is she destroying her life?”
That moment was the ignition point that my mind needed to find the Inner Strength to really see things and find perspective. I realised at that point that nothing was going to change and things will go on like this, if I let them be. I needed a lot of strength to put myself first and realise how my life was being ruined for me.
These thoughts snowballed some action in my head and before I knew it, Self-Love took over. I saw the need to put myself before anyone else – parents, spouse, family, friends, neighbours……. and just take stock of the situation from my viewpoint alone.
Sanity returned to my mind when I made the Decision to walk out of that house of misery and took the first step towards my happiness by doing just so.
Did I face opposition? Oh Yes! plenty of it. Hardly found anyone on my side. But I didn’t let it deter me as my Self-Belief was strong as was my Faith in the almighty who I felt was guiding me through it all.
My plan was clear – get self-reliant in terms of finances and Trust my instincts in finding the right job, home and city for myself to be in.
Depression still pressed on, but now I was Determined to not feel guilty and allow myself the grief that I thought was not mine to dwell in.
Getting up everyday and going to work, eating food and just being able to converse with people was a huge chore for me and some days I wouldn’t even get out of bed. Other days I would make plans to go out and treat myself with shopping or just ice cream.
Thanks to some wonderful people in my life, I found the right legal help to sort out the mess. I also found the support to stand in a court of law by myself and go through the process. All of it was made possible because I found the inner strength to ask for help.
Through it all I was determined to not be bitter or hurtful and wished for the entire process to be amicable and peaceful. I found it in my heart to be Grateful to just have the strength to get out of it; rather than curse my fate for getting into it.
I am thankful that as a human being I had the faith to believe that things will get better; there is a better and higher plan for me.
This post has been attempted for the blog prompt put out by Amrita Basu and Tina Basu for #ThankfulThursdays
Linking up this post for Day #15 of the Ultimate Blog Challenge
A post well worth cheering over and sharing.This took incredible strength. Kudos!
Thank you for such lovely words Alana!! 🙂
Nice to see you overcame your depression
Thanks Nishta…. 🙂
It’s so hard to feel gratitude when facing a difficult situation! Congratulations on staying so positive, and I hope that everything works out for you! Great blog post!
Thanks so much Alice. My faith in the divine kept me going and it still does!! 🙂
What can I say ? We are kindred soul’s in more ways than you know. It takes a lot to let go.To stop trying to fix things. .I know it does. You have to do it, to not let this beautiful life be withour a reason.
Some battle scars we need to grow stronger.You are a survivor with a smile making a difference.
Thanks a lot for writing with us for #Thankful Thursdays “being human ” truly is a blessing by itself.
God Bless you .
Thanks so much Amzee; its so good to hear from you; your support is just priceless for me 🙂
Good to know you were brave enough to come out of the mess and a bad relationship. It takes a lot of courage and not many people are this strong. But you did a right thing as its better to walk away than suffer your whole life. More power to u and your blog Shalini. 🙂
Thanks so much Deepa 🙂
Good to see that you overcame it all with the strength you were blessed with. It’s at times like these that we need to summon the strength, the courage that we have been blessed with, but which we know not existed.
So happy for you!
Thanks so much Shilpa! 🙂 I am grateful to the divine for the strength
Thank you for sharing this with us. It is applaudable when one realises that things that don’t move forward must be left behind.
I truly love the title of your post, and of course your post itself, Shalini.
Kudos to you!
Cheers M!! Your words always lift me up 🙂
Gratitude amazingly brings us from a place of blah to blessings. I love the positive vibes and lessons.
Thanks Lux.. that’s pretty true!!
Shalini, what you did was a brave step and not everyone is strong enough to leave bitter relation behind and move forward. I agree no one stands with you when you take these bold steps for yourself but only you. Bravo.
Thanks Upasna. It’s not easy but it was a necessary thing to do….
Moving forward is the only way and nothing can stop it. It is in best interest to move forward to keep yourself happy. I am so happy you did that.
Thanks Tina…. I am also happy about it now. So glad I had the sense to do it…