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Love, Stalk, Kill! { Women Safety } #MondayMusings

Even as we were rejoicing the confirmation of the death penalty for Nirbhayata’s rapists, another horrific rape filled the timelines. This time it was from Rohtak, Haryana where a man and his cronies abducted, raped, mutilated and killed a girl who had refused to marry him.

That this came so close on the heels of the Supreme Court verdict, lends fuel to the belief that even death penalty is not enough to deter these monsters in India.

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Why is it that Indian men don’t take into account “consent” of a woman? Why is the “No means No” fall on deaf ears? Men here take it as a challenge rather than a deterrent. But why?

I blame Hindi cinema’s pedantic fare selling of Love in the cliché’ ridden plots of hero chasing a girl, literally to death while everyone and their uncle whistling their appreciation of the feat. The mindless portrayal of a boy falling in love and then plotting to get his woman to say yes makes me grit my teeth in exasperation.

Okay so the 80s and 90s were “backward” and the film makers were not so “on-it” and this Love formula was beaten to death there.

Whats the excuse today when we are self-proclaimed intelligentsia not to mention social media pros?

We are in 2017 where in every movie celeb her worth is on Social media with their own PR cells managing these accounts, opinions of every sort are solicited from them on every thing and they seem to be breaking barriers by stepping into the hallowed lands of Hollywood too with great verve and walking the red carpets seem to be such a breeze for them.

Then why do we see these seemingly intelligent well spoken and articulate elite set still sticking to the sickening script of No does not mean No????

Take the case of Badri Ki Dulhania! A commoner (read tier 2 city resident) falls for a girl from a similar social background who is more interested in making a career than a marriage. Undeterred the hero chases her with mindless lines like “Why doesn’t she get it that I love her? I want to marry her and not make her my GF – doesn’t this prove how serious I am about her?”

Seriously dude!! What century are you plugging this fare in?

All was well till the girl ends up falling for him and saying …. what else – I love you too!!!


Varun Dhawan and Alia Bhatt are touted to be two of the promising stars of this generation – not so much in my opinion if this is what they like to sell vis-a-vis their talent. Does this generation possess a brain?

Have this duo considered who sees this type of movies? Are they aware of the incidents women seem to be facing on a daily basis in app-based cabs where the drivers are not in the least bit scared to misbehave on these lines with women passengers? Or the rapes and acid attacks that seem to be on the rise?

Dhawan does own the sobriquet of being the son of a man who made the sickening filthy movie wherein the hero’s sidekick gyrate his pelvic region obscenely to an equally lewd tune which leaves nothing to imagination. Much of that movie had similar nuances and to sum it aptly was a huge trashy affair. So maybe I shouldnt be too harsh on him, despite his amazing portrayal of a broken man seeking revenge for his world going under in Badlapur.

Take the case of Arjun Kapoor and the trailers of Half Girlfriend where he is mouthing off dialogues to appease the object of his affection who is least interested in him and has turned around on several occasions to say so clearly to him. But does he listen? Oh no! It only spurs him on to become obsessive to the point wherein he vows to make her understand his love by hook or crook.

Dude if a woman is saying not interested; no matter how much you love her, please step back and let her be. It’s not a challenge to be taken head-on without a thought.

And this is Arjun Kapoor- another GEN XX actor but it seems no brains here as well.

What should I say to Chetan Bhagat for this mind numbing affair that he has dished out to appease his readers? Again, does he know his audience and what he is putting out there for them to savour? BTW this man’s books have been included in our education programmes!! Wonderful!

Read a review on this movie which sums this crap up very succinctly here

Offscreen, these very personalities scream themselves hoarse to assert rights, independence, respect to women, blah, blah blah…… But onscreen is a matter of commercial success and so they will mouth any vapid dialogue, gyrate to obscenity and play the victim to the hilt – no questions asked!!!

All of these so-called intellectuals are working overtime to feed the Indian mentality with the thought that its okay to stalk and obsess a woman if you think you are in love with her. Never mind what the woman says, since her consent is taken for granted or rather not at all.

I wish ill from the bottom of my heart to these newbies (and others) over their commercial successes via such ridiculous and mind numbing plots which seem to be inspiring a certain sect of the society to ill-treat women in the name of love!

I yearn to see a death penalty for every rapist, child molester, sodomists and for that very reason I have signed up this petition on Change.org and you can too if you feel strongly about it.

I am linking this post up with Corinne’s #MondayMusings

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21 thoughts on “Love, Stalk, Kill! { Women Safety } #MondayMusings

  1. Now that’s some food for thought. It’s highly unfortunate that such things are happening frequently and people are acting as dumb spectators. BTW that fight violence pic is from CP right ?

    1. YUp thats a pic from CP- well spotted my friend! I have been taking pics of the graffitti whenever I spot one – have such a thing for it!!

  2. Oh I agree wholeheartedly. I didn’t watch BKD for this reason alone. I hate how the boys seem to think that their love for a girl is enough justification for them to completely own her. We do have an odd Pink being made for which I am grateful, yet a vast majority will identify with Varun Dhawan and Arjun Kapoor. That’s truly truly scary.

    1. Damn scary scenario for sure; I wish I could slap some sense in these stupid heros and heroines!!! 😉

  3. Wait what? Chetan Bhagat’s book is included in education programme?! Entertaining as they might be but it gets in my nerves how all his female characters convey that they don’t say what they mean. And yes, Bollywood plotlines have a long way to go. But people don’t really sit and think through it much now do they?

    1. Obsession can be a very big ordeal for a woman; more often our society blames the woman for it which further compounds her problem!

  4. sadly, you are not wrong. Nirbhaya is now a word that evokes fear in women instead of rapists… that is how far we have let it devolve. and as for Bollywood, this article could not have come at a better time – Half Girlfriend is regressive cinema at its best…

    1. You have hit the nail on the head doc- it invokes major fear in me and I have changed a lot of my lifestyle to ensure there are not too late a night and no driving back alone kind of scenarios now. Thanks for voting this as regressive cinema- its absolutely just that

  5. This is the sad reality of our society where hindi cinema with these kinds of movies is making even more difficult for women in our country. High time we make better films and teach better things to our new generation.

    1. I know Deepa its a very pathetic thing now! I am so fed up seeing these young guns enacting out such sordid scenes! God knows when will we have intelligent actors

  6. Why can’t the men take no? We know the answer. A boy, as soon as he born, gets a royalty status and a preferential treatment over the female members in the family. He never hears a No at home. He never gets bound by the rules at home and he witnesses quite frequently women being demeaned, including his mother. Thus how can he accept a No from a girl in the street, in the college or elsewhere. A woman is, sadly, a commodity to be owned.
    There is an article in today’s Navbharat Times with the headline – ‘There is dire scarcity of good scripts in Bollywood’. Guess who said that – Chetan Bhagat. I simply stay away from movies for most part of the year since I lost the appetite to gulp down trash.

  7. I really hate it when movies endorse stalking of a woman who later seems to fall for that guy setting such a wrong precedent. It’s just terrible what women put up with on a daily basis — all the harassment.

  8. Movies are to be blamed too without a doubt. Almost every movie idolizes the hero who stalks his girl and is obsessed with her to crazy extents. Remember ‘Raanjhana’? I found that movie to be extremely psychotic.

    Our country has become such a “chaltha hai” place now that everything seems to be okay. Women are more scared than rapists these days. And the movies and situations around are only aggravating this.

  9. I hear every word you say, Shalz. It’s become a frightening world to live in, and it just seems to get worse. And to an extend, I agree that commercial cinema is to blame. Yes, they do say it’s a movie and all that, but all those warnings are about as useful as the image of throat cancer on packet of cigarette – it just doesn’t cut it.
    But we have to keep hoping things will change, and do everything we can as individuals to make sure things improve.

  10. Really, Shalz, the people who portray these characters on screen have no inkling of what it is to be stalked by an obsessed lover. It is scary as hell, but how will they know? They, who have a bevy of bodyguards guarding them all the time, they will naturally have no idea about the fear that other women go through! I so agree with you on every point.
    Will the situation ever change? Will the people, who inspire the masses, learn their responsibility towards the public who idolises them so?

  11. hmmm… well, I think one thing is ‘missed’ and this is a bit out of experience. Love has so many things in it – liking, having a good time with a person, doing things together, respecting other. It’s certainly a bit of friendship involved and emotional connection. These bonds take time to develop. So, instead of being impatient, try to understand the person, the circumtance before like doing this love after girl stuff… all of us need counselling to get that maturity. Just because you think you want a person, it may not be the same for the other. Have to have less ego… I don’t watch movies like that so can’t comment. Lots to comment on women crimes, especially that juvinile rapist in Nirbhaya case set free, we should write to Narendra Modi and make a petition to not set that evil juvinile free. He is dangerous to the world, Fact!! … fact that he is let free because he was few months younger than 18 when he commited crime upsets me still!!… and dash it why can’t we encourage women to learn some self defence techniques, seriously it is more empowering than education thesedays.

  12. Those movies are insulting to everyone – the bold girl who after a kiss becomes dependent on the man, the man all it takes was to show off his strength by overpowering the female which translated as his love, affection and care. No wonder I never wanted to get married or fall in love when I was younger.

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